Transgressions

Well, I'm not sure what or where to start, since the last blog post has happened well over a month ago... so I'll start at an arbitrary date within the past few weeks and work from there.

*cracks knuckles*
Alright, randomly during the winter break (aka Christmas) I decided to start going back onto Second Life and screw around with random friends and whatnot. When I got there I noted how a majority of my friends had disappeared... So I decided to get a fellow Deviant Artist to come online with me to make it more fun for the both of us. She somehow managed to get a furry avie almost immediately as well as a boyfriend. Thats just lovely, isn't it? :)

I was just messing around with a few of my friends when I randomly met this lovely girl. It was only later (about a week) that we talked in depth; I was going absolutely OCD- cleaning my room to the point of absolute cleanliness. I'm not sure what she saw in me... certainly I wasn't at my best at the time, but we eventually started seeing each other and went out on a few dates. We're still together nearly 2 months later, and I couldn't be happier :)

Now, for those who don't know, I generally play various video games as a female character. I refuse to give any weak arguments here, and my primary reason why I do so will be explained momentarily. I play on Second Life much similarly, only a few times being male and then slowly regressing back into female avatars. Its quite interesting, really. I would, as some of you all know, be able to keep up a feminine-esque conversation while in my female avatar, so it was no big deal.

Randomly, after becoming bored with most of the places that I've visited thus far in Second Life, decided some 3 weeks ago to see if there is a Transgenders place on Second Life. Sure enough there was, and I began to chat with the people and thoroughly enjoyed it. My weak excuse at the time was that I felt that I supported them, but nothing more. Now I know that I was wrong.

Truth is that I've been somewhat hiding my idea that I would much rather be a girl than a lame guy for little over 10+ years. I hid it pretty well under attempts at overly masculine roles and facial hair... none of which I really wanted nor really enjoyed- hence my recent bout of depression. I realize, all of this, by taking my herbal anti-depressants that I had have these feelings for oh so many years. I had in fact researched how to change my sex ages ago, but more or less tried to ignore it. It resurfaced, and I'm now ready to accept it.

Anyway, I met a bunch of people at the Transgender Resource Center... and I claimed to be 'on the fence' about the issue. Told them all about myself to which they responded with everything I could want to know about them... even my questions were answered with great care and to they're fullest. I love the LGBT community- truly my favorite group of people on the planet :)

So, I thought I 'd ought to talk to my psychologist about these reoccurring thoughts about gender, to which she agreed that it was something that should continue to be explored by our weekly meetings. I was happier than a clam because there, without a doubt, was definitive proof that something was going to finally be done about my transsexualism ^_^. Just after I left from seeing her, I went to the sammich shop on campus, the lady called upon me "Is there anything I can get you ma'am?" I blushed. She was actually talking to the girl behind me, but that experience was just awesome ;D

Without a doubt that week was the best week ever, since I got something off my chest. Sure, I haven't elaborated to full detail about my logical connection as to why I think I am transsexual, but I feel that its none of your business and more business for me :)  So long as I think this way, what do I care about people saying that I'm not?

Also, this week I believe I'm sick... but I'm still optimistic! :D
Oh, and I broke my bike key in my bike lock, so I'm going to have to get a pair of bolt cutters and not look suspicious >.>

If you are one of the few people who actually know me physically, please have some respect for me and don't disclose this information with others without my consent. Thank you.